- Try Jesus, if you don't
like Him, the devil will always take
- Staying in bed shouting "
OH GOD" does not constitute going to
" This is a ch
is missing ? " ------ (
" Try our
They are better than
" Free Trip to heaven.
Details Inside ! "
" Searching for a
new look ? Have your faith lifted
here ! "
" Running low on
faith ? Stop in for a fill-up . "
- Walmart is not the only saving place !
was a church that had problem with
outsiders parking in its parking lots,
so they put up a sign:
CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY;
Trespassers will be
An ad for one Church has a picture of two
hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are
inscribed and a headline that reads, "
For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets
- God does not believe in atheists, therefore
atheists do not exist.
- The fact that there's a
highway to hell and only a stairway to
- Jesus is watching, but the police have radar.
- Honk if you love Jesus, text while driving if you want to meet Him.
- God gives peace when you go to pieces.
In the dark ? Follow the
Exposure to the SON may
Son screen prevents sin burn.
- If God is your copilot,
If you're headed
in the wrong direction,
If you don't like the way you were
born, try being
- Bring your sin to the
Altar and drop it like it's Hot.
- Sin is like a credit card, enjoy it now but pay for it later.
It is unlikely
there'll be a reduction in the wages
- Salvation guaranteed or all
sins refunded !
Forbidden fruit creates
- Be careful who you
trust, the devil was once angel.
- Adam and Eve were the first ones to ignore Apple's terms and conditions.
- Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed
the snake and the snake didn't have
a leg to stand on.
If you can't sleep,
don't count sheep. Talk to the
- Life is like a pencil,
without Jesus there's no point.
- Read the Bible - It will
scare the hell out of you !
- They are some questions
that can't be answered by Google.
Dusty Bibles lead
to Dirty Lives.
Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
- How do we make Holy
water ? We boil the hell out of it
People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
- Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school but they can in prison ?
- Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside ?
" Come work for
the Lord. The work is hard, the
hours are long and the pay is low.
But the retirement benefits are out of
this world . "
- Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over ?